Where are Tinus and Barrie?

I’m writing this from Pakse in Laos, and this will be a again be a long post, since three weeks in Cambodia gives one plenty of food for thought. Barrie has covered most of the important day-to-day activities already, so I’ll pick out some other things although there is some overlap. But again, pics below, many scrolls away.

I absolutely fell in love with the country that seemed to be in a swirling, energetic period of change when we were there. We arrived in Phnom Penh on 16 July, just days before the elections held every five years. The usual drill is that the Cambodia People’s Party lead by PM of 30 years, mr. Hun Sen, wins with a very large majority of the votes. Not too surprising, since Cambodia is more or less a dictatorship with the CPP controlling all major media outlets and in some cases the ways votes are cast and counted. However, since 70% (!) of all Cambodians is under 35 (post Khmer Rouge baby-boomers), this large majority of the population gets its news in modern ways, via social media and other online media sources not in CPP hands and sees that change is needed to avoid the rich getting richer and the poor being kept poor and uneducated. And indeed these elections were different: the opposition party CNRP almost got the same number of votes of the CPP, and that’s excluding the very probable tampering with election results! It’s going to be interesting to follow the political and societal changes, here’s a great website that Barrie and I found to be giving the most fair coverage of what’s going on.

Of course, the situation is much more complex than merely young people wanting change, although seeing hundreds and hundreds of them shouting for it loudly whilst driving around in large flocks in Phnom Penh on their motorbikes proudly holding opposition flags was quite a sight. And that was just on day 1! During our stay we talked to countless people, young and old, who so desperately want Cambodia to compete with its economically strong and fierce neighbours: Thailand and Vietnam. And indeed it has so much going for it: incredibly smart and hard-working people who talk English so well in most cases it baffled us considering the poor state of education, and so friendly it was almost unbelievable. Seriously, it’s hard to meet an asshole in this country, if you exclude some of the tourists that is.

All right, we mostly met awesome people along the way (looking at you J. and L.!), but the Chinese guy who picked up his cellphone at the Killing Fields, loudly had a conversation to the shock of everyone around him, and then hung up and licked his lips while looking at a stack of bones really gets the Golden Asshole award. It will take a tough competitor to remove him from the nr. 1 spot, but perhaps we’ll meet a person who kicks an orphan while strangling a puppy. You never know!

Most will be baffled and puzzled to read this, but I had the most fun in Cambodia with the kids. Wherever we went – even in Phnom Penh – kids would shout “hello!” and wave at us. This felt so strange at first, since there’s loads of tourist on the not-so-off-the-beaten-track places we went to, but it made me feel very welcome. The funniest exchange I had in Angkor, where hordes of kids storm at you every temple you visit (and there are many, many temples) and rattle off the same lines. “Where you from?” “Holland.” “Capital: Amsterdam. Een, twee, drie, vier, vijf, zes, zeven, acht, negen, tien. You buy from me [bracelet, booklet, magnet, whatever-et], business slow today. Only two [fill in item here] for one doll-ah.” Really, the same shtick everywhere, but it never got old. If you just smiled and said “no thanks”, that was that. [Special Silver Asshole award for the guy yelling at a kid “NO NO NO I WILL NOT BUY FROM YOU, YOU UNDERSTAND!”] However, at some point I was waiting for Barrie, sitting on a rock, and a girl sat down and did the shtick and I said no thanks. That was it, she kept sitting there, just relaxing, but then a boy of around five years old showed up to and wouldn’t let up. His record got caught in “Slow business today, two fow-a one doll-ah”, he just kept on saying it, and I burst out laughing, together with the little girl. He got mad and said to me: “You’re a Mister!!!!”, whilst pointing at a picture of a man in a magazine. That didn’t help and I laughed and pointed to a woman and said he was a girl. In the end, I did buy some magnets off him (R&D colleagues, watch out for these!). The kids at the Angkor temples only added to the charm, and did not at all distract me. In fact, I can safely say I’ve never seen any temple complex that can even touch Angkor, and I’ve been to Tikal, Chichen Itza and Palenque, which are all magical as well, but not this special.

A random highlight for me was scaring the shit out of some unsuspecting Cambodians. We rented a moto for a day and I was driving to the gas station to fill it up before we hit the road. While driving, I thought I felt something in my shoe. At the gas station, I decided to check if there was indeed a tiny hitchhiker hidden in my sweaty footwear, and when I checked a sizable beetle flew out of my shoe, which lead to three gas station attendants screaming. So wished I had a picture of their faces…To balance this with a definite low point of the country of the Khmer: I got too curious about how it would be to eat durian. This usually smelly fruit (and smelly is here a definite euphemism) could actually taste like “a rich custard highly flavoured with almonds”, according to A.R. Wallace, one of my heroes in the naturalist/biologist realm, a man that thought of the evolution theory around the same time as Darwin, but also a man mostly forgotten by popular history. Anyway, brilliant guy, so who am I to not try durian then! I decided on a durian shake, hoping it would somehow taste good in liquid form. Well, if you want to know how it tastes to drink raw, pureed onion with a dash of rotten eggs and sewage, you’re in luck! You should totally drink a durian shake! I only took one sip and it took four hours to get the taste out of my mouth.

And now lessobservations habituelles:

* Drive slow, homey. There are motos, cars, tuk-tuks and other things on wheels everywhere. At first, we thought we’d never be able to cross a street in Phnom Penh, but upon close inspection we learned people drive about 15 kilometers per hour and gladly swerve around you – in a leisurely fashion of course – to let you pass. The most relaxed drivers I’ve ever seen, although outside of the cities bus drivers suddenly are overcome with the need for speed and a taste for blood.

* Honk if you…want to communicate anything. Don’t be fooled by the honking in Cambodian traffic. Surely, I thought, it must mean danger is lurking around every corner! But no, it just means “I’m passing you”, or “Hey, what’s up”, or “I like your ride, or “Kant was right, we never directly experience things, our senses let us experience our so-called phenomenal world.” Seriously, there’s all honking, all the time, and it can mean anything.

* Cross-stitchin’ is bitchin’. Throughout the country, we saw women cross-stitching. It usually was a sort of ‘stitching by numbers’ type of deal with loads of flowers, and I assume all houses in Cambodia contain at least one framed cross-stitch painting.

* Things we need to introduce in Holland. I LOVED that pretty much all restaurants provide little trash can next to each table. Superhandy! Also, the deliciousness that is a mint and crushed ice shake and lime with honey juice need to get their liquid asses over to the Netherlands. Supercheap to make and so lovely…

* Drawings > pictures. Many of the signs in Cambodia aren’t photos, but quite crudely drawn pictures of: teeth, women in full make-up, campaigns against domestic violence, anything. Some examples below.

* Why wear uncomfortable clothes when you can wear pajamas! We saw many girls and women over thirty out and about wear PJs instead of regular clothes. All were very colourful and usually had pictures of bears and kittens on them. It seems super-comfortable and could be another thing to introduce in Holland.

* English is relative. Many shirts and bags contain English words. Or letters that have been thrown together that seem like a word. The amazing-ness of this surprised me every time. Some examples: “money, cheese, happy, cristmas” and “You re my ererything Fouever Dnd the day”.

Well, that’s it for now. I’ll be honest, I’m having a hard time adjusting to Laos after Cambodia. People here seem to be quieter, more reserved and just not as happy to help a clueless tourist like myself out. However, since many people say that Laos is the most friendly and laid-back country in South-East Asia, I’m sure we’ve just been a bit unlucky so far. Until next time!

Serious cross-stitching

You know, kind of type, sorta thing

Impressive electrical wiring

Honest advertising

You can transport your family AND your dog on one moto!

LOL I’m a lion!

When Barrie and Tinus met Teddy from Arizona.

Millions of bats!

Engrish

Cooking course

Durian roundabout in Kampot

PJs

More PJs

Ok!

Even more Ok! with J. and L.